Ouch. I woke up in a lot of emotional pain this morning and I know exactly why. Last night I shared my past with a new friend of mine going into major detail of the traumas, the hurt, the despair and I basically felt like I relived each event. I felt my heart shatter into […]
“Emotional pain is not just a psychological issue; it is a spiritual issue. Depression may or may not be a disease of the brain, but it is definitely a disease of the soul. Modern psychotherapy has taken up some of the slack, and yet it too fails to deliver when it doesn’t acknowledge the soul […]
I finally heard it. The exact words that describe what happened to me when I was a little girl. “My spirit got broken.” When I heard someone say those words the other day, a whole new world of pain opened up for me when I realized that it was exactly it, the perfect description to […]
One would think after so many years of weathering the storm of depression it would become less scary to fall into the deep, dark abyss….but it’s not. When the lows last for more than a couple days, the pain becomes so debilitating and heavy you fear that it’s never going to go away. You look outside at […]
I have always been drawn to the Lotus Flower. The brightness, the clarity of it’s edges, the warmth and it’s flawless beauty, it’s always ‘spoken’ to my heart. When I first saw the quote, “No Mud, No Lotus”, I had no idea what it meant until I heard the story of how the Lotus flowers […]
It was a cold, rainy and dreary day in San Francisco. The weather outside matched exactly how I felt on the inside, miserable. I was at an emotional, physical and spiritual rock bottom and I saw no end to this state of being in sight. I was hopeless and seemingly powerless to the life I […]
Today I received an email from someone who had read my article “Don’t Let Anyone Or Anything Dim Your Inner Light” on TinyBuddha.Com: Courtney, I want to thank you for the article. For the last few years I feel as though I lost my light. Almost as though I no longer have a soul. I’ve been trying […]
Powerless at the Ocean.. Tonight I decided to take a solo trip out to Santa Cruz and stay at a hotel room on the beach to find out where I am at my deepest emotional level. The beach is where I am reminded that I am powerless over a lot of things in my life […]
It happened again. I fell down that same familiar dark hole and there was no light in sight. It was one of those days where the pain is so intense it sears through my heart, into my chest, down to my stomach and my body becomes numb with fear. I have been here before but […]
This week is Mental Illness Awareness Week and I came across this quote today which made me feel compelled to write. It reminds me that even though my world feels dark, scary and lonely when my depression comes on, that does not mean there is not something beautiful and light still present in my heart. When my mind […]
Happiness, Love and Light 